the worst part is when people come up to me and start talking to me about him, asking me about what he’s doing. i wish i could tell them, i wish i didn’t have to pretend to know. i wish i didn’t have to quell the shock from my face and the hurt from my clenched fists. i wish i had the courage to ask him to let me back in because there’s more than an ocean between us now and i miss him. i miss the best friend and the lover and the stranger and the enemy.